The Unanticipated Moment

 

I am stepping away from the stated format of this blog to document something that happened so quickly, I could have never anticipated it at all.

Yesterday I got a phone call from my long time friend Becky. She and her partner Gordon had recently made a trip to Cancun, and I wanted to hear all about it. We had a great conversation, and I found out Gordon collects coins and is interested in some of Jim's collection. Yay.

Becky said they are going to St. Louis for a family party which is on April 6. She said they decided to stop in Nashville on the way back. Like most people, they have gone once and must return!

When we went to hang up I found myself saying, "Maybe I'll meet you in Nashville." I had no premeditation of saying this. It just popped out of my mouth. She was excited, said that would be great. I didn't seem to have an attachment to the idea because, well, it flew out of my mouth before I actually had time to think about it.

Once we hung up, I looked at flights and sure enough, Southwest has some direct connections and availability. This idea seems to be taking form as something I will actually do.

This morning I was writing about it in my journal and realized: This was my first "retirement moment."

This is the first time I made a spontaneous decision without having to think too much of the logistics. There is no less-than-healthy spouse to consider. There is improved health on my part. There is money to work with. There is no job commitment to maneuver around. Just doing what I want to do.

When I retired, it was in the midst of the loss of my husband and ongoing health issues. I rejoined my church to have structure that would sustain me through these situations. I have been saying I don't even know what retirement is, as there has been just too much swirling around me that demands attention.

Yesterday was the first time I felt the benefit of being retired. 

Coincidentally, this took place right on the anniversary of Jim's first chemo treatment last year.

It stuns me to think about how much things have changed.